I believe in eternal marriage. I believe in making sacred covenants to cleave to one man throughout my whole life and throughout all eternity.One of the things that sets the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints apart from other faiths is our belief in marriage for "time and all eternity". In a time in our society when many think marriage is passe', we believe very strongly in the sanctity of marriage not just "till death do you part" but forever.
Perhaps the basic belief in enduring bonds is not that unusual. I've talked to lots of people from other faiths (or no faith at all) who say they believe they will be with their spouse and family in the hereafter. I've heard it said that they believe their love will endure beyond this mortal walk on earth. However, for the LDS faith, it is a key part of our doctrine. We believe that when worthy men and women area "sealed" as husband and wife in the holy temples, we truly are united for eternity.
HOWEVER.... that does not mean our marriages are bullet proof. Not by a long shot. Living with another person is wonderful and joyful and sometimes just plain hard.
All marriages have good times and tough times. The trick is to learn how to navigate the challenges with grace, humor and compassion for one another so that we can continue the journey to get the joy of the good parts.
Tonight my husband and I went to a church meeting intended for married couples where a marriage counselor gave a really amazing talk on how to build strong unions. The presenter made a key distinction that I think is absolutely vital. He spoke abut COMMITMENT being the critical base of all relationships, with communication coming after that. I agree. While being able to effectively communicate in a relationship is extremely important, if we are not committed to one another and to the union, all the best communication in the word will not save us.
Our Bishop also spoke at the meeting, relaying the story of his grandparents and all the things he learned about healthy marriages from them. He cautioned us to beware of the "deal breakers". Things he spoke of that can ruin a marriage included:
One spouse trying to control or dominate the other
infidelity
selfishness
unrealistic expectations
As he was speaking I thought of my own marriage of 29 years. I LOVE my sweet husband. Yet I know there have been times I have been selfish. I know there have been times I have had unrealistic expectations.
Those are things I can work on in order to improve the strength of our marriage.
Because I am in this for the long haul.
I am in this for keeps.
I am absolutely committed to this marriage for time and all eternity.
What an amazing blessing that is!
